Merry Christmas from Missouri!

Tom and I are fortunate to be able to spend Christmas with David, Amy, Michael and Benjamin this year. It has been wonderful to be in their home and share this special time with them, to see the traditions they are carrying on from generation to generation. We had a lovely dinner Christmas eve, with ham and all the trimmings. Michael got to sleep just minutes before Santa arrived with his presents. Now some of you are accustomed to being awakened at three o'clock a.m. on Christmas morning by children who are so anxious to see what Santa brought that the moment the clatter of the reindeer is disappeared from the roof the kids are shaking you--"Is it time yet? Can we go see what he brought?" We were lucky to be able to sleep late.

Tom and I woke after eight o'clock this morning and Tom peeked to see if Michael was stirring. He was lying on his bed with his eyes open. I think he might not have remembered what day it was. Eventually we all made it downstairs and Michael was excited to see the police car, ambulance, stuffed beagle, and stocking full of toys that Santa left for him. He was equally excited to see what Santa gave Benjamin. We had fun watching him. Then we had our typical unhealthy breakfast of pumpkin roll (and apple pie)--except David, that is. He had cereal, refusing to join us in our attack against our bodies.

I checked my blogs while Tom was watching the video David and Amy gave him (Bill Cosby Himself). David and Amy took turns talking to his mother. I got teary-eyed thinking about all my other family that I don't get to see this year. It is unlikely that I will ever get to have all my family together in one place for the holidays. But I want you all to know that no matter where I am you are all in my heart at the same time. And so, in honor of all of you, here's a song for this Christmas--with a little twist in the words:

Merry Christmas, Darlings, we're apart, that's true.
But I can dream, and in my dreams, I'm Christmasing with you.
Holidays are joyful, there's always something new,
But every day's a holiday when I'm near to you.
The lights on your tree I wish I could see, I wish it every day.
Logs on the fire fill me with desire to see you and to say
That I wish you merry Christmas, Happy New Year, too,
I've just one wish on this Christmas Day, I wish I were with you,
I wish I were with you.

I would if I could

Well, I got a call yesterday saying I had been deferred as a bone marrow donor--not permanently, just for a couple of months. It's a result of the diverticulitis that attacked me in August. Now, it's not something I can pass on to anyone else. It's a condition caused by aging--wear and tear on the intestines. When they get worn out they develop pockets which can become plugged and then infected. The pockets are called diverticula, having them is called diverticulosis, and when they get infected it's called diverticulitis. But just having been diagnosed with it so recently they want to wait and if I'm a possible match for someone in the future they can see if I've been doing alright in spite of the diagnosis.

I told a friend this morning and she reminded me that the important thing was that I was willing. It's true; I had thought it would be a nice Christmas present to someone to share my bone marrow with them so they could live. But I will not be able to do that so I am trying to curb the disappointment by thinking about how I can still give my heart to the Lord.

I have plenty of other opportunities to give, too, and that should keep me busy enough. In fact, I've got to get to one of those opportunities right now: I need to get ready for tomorrow's den meeting! It's the last one of the year for those four ten-year-old boys. I want it to be memorable.

More than enough to spare....

Okay, I just thought of one more thing I wanted to share. I received a phone call this morning minutes before I was to walk out the door and join my walking companions for our daily one-hour walk. The caller ID said "IN Blood Ctr" and I took a moment to consider whether or not this was a call soliciting funds. I decided to answer and find out. The young lady caller asked if I remembered registering for the blood marrow donor list while we lived in Indiana. I said I did. Then she told me that my marrow has been found to be a possible match for a forty-four-year-old man in Indiana. She asked if I would be willing to fill out a health questionnaire to determine if I qualify. I readily agreed and she emailed me the seven-page form which I completed as soon as I returned from my walk. It's already been faxed to her office in Indiana. If they approve me based on what's in the questionnaire, then the next step would be for me to be contacted by an agency in Utah who would do some blood testing. If that turns out well, then I can be a donor. I will not have to leave the state and it will cost me nothing. I would like to do this. But maybe it will turn out the same as my jury summons this year. I was summoned to be available to serve anytime from September 1st to December 31st and I haven't yet been called to the Federal Courthouse. It appears this time I'm not needed. I would really like to serve on a jury someday!

Okay. Now I have to pay my bills. It's on my list of things to do.

Well, I WAS going to go to bed, Amy.

I read Amy's blog tonight and then watched Cindy and her elf friends dance. I was going to go to bed but suddenly felt an urge to write something in my own blog. I'm not prepared to write about another of my children. I have to find some cute stories in my journal first. Talking about the weather and politics and such is not appealing (and those subjects may be a bit boring right now, anyway). What should I write that would make it worth reading? Hmmmmmm.....

I know! I've wished that there were some kind of list of things we should or should not do in order to feel we were right in the eyes of the Lord. You know, a list we could check off as we did each one, or as we acquired certain traits or developed certain talents. For example, 1. Never tell a lie. 2. If you ever tell a lie, be certain to repent immediately. 3. If you lied a long time ago and didn't ever repent, go buy some fresh lambchops and cook them very, very well on your barbecue grill and then offer them to the missionaries.

Really, I don't mean to make light of what really is something very important. I WANT to do what is right. I WANT to please Heavenly Father. I WANT to know I will one day be worthy to stand in His presence. I have spent far too much time worrying about mistakes already made or mistakes I might make today or tomorrow. I want Him to give me a list just like He gave Moses and the wandering Israelites (the Ten Commandments). I am a list person. I make lists of everything I want to do the next day or week or month. I make lists of what I need to buy. I make lists of what I want to do for my family for Christmas. I make lists of activities I want to do for piano lessons or scouts meetings. I make lists of lists. Now I just want a list of what I have to do in this life in order to feel I have accomplished the reasons I am here on the earth.

Well, last night I found a list. It jumped right out at me as I was reading scriptures. At least, I felt it was a good place to start. If I can follow this guidance from the Lord I just might have a chance. I found my list in Doctrine and Covenants Section 4.

Here are some of the things I noted in my journal:

Embark in the service of God.
Serve Him with ALL your heart, might, mind and strength.
Thrust in your sickle with your might.
Have faith, hope, charity and love.
Have an eye single to the glory of God.
Develop these: faith, virtue, knowledge, temperance, patience, brotherly kindness, godliness, charity, humility, and diligence.
Seek after the things of God ("Ask and ye shall receive, knock and it shall be opened unto you.")

Now I have to get to work becoming and doing all these things! I'm certain I've lived more than half my life, so time's a-wasting! I've got a lot to do!

(Elder Bednar's conference address about prayer was extremely helpful to me in regards to my personal prayers. It also is a kind of checklist for me and I feel my prayers are already becoming more meaningful as I consider and apply what he taught.)

Now I'm going to bed. And going to bed for me includes washing my face, brushing my teeth, putting on my pajamas, having prayer, writing in my journal, reading from all five standard works (Old Testament, New Testament, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, and Pearl of Great Price---I LOVE reading them all at once! I never before enjoyed the scriptures as much as I do now; you should try it sometime!) and I also read from the Ensign Magazine. (I've not been very good at taking advantage of the wonderful material in the Ensign, and finally figured out that if I attach it to something I know I will do every day then I'd get it done. So I started making it part of my scripture reading.)

Oh, wait! I can't go to bed yet! I have some bills I determined I was going to pay TODAY, and I've only got one hour left! Then I can rest in peace.