Lifetime!!!

Last week I became a Lifetime Member of Weight Watchers! That was a big day for me. What that means is that I don't have to pay to go in and be weighed and attend the meetings, unless I have gained two pounds or more over my goal weight. That will keep me mindful of what I eat. I've learned a lot the last few months, and I have to say that I am so glad my own children have learned these same things much earlier than I did. I thought I was a good mother, feeling my children well, teaching them good health habits. But I'd always been able to eat anything without it affecting my weight so I hadn't learned to be careful about how much fatty and sweet food I ate. It all caught up with me after I'd had all my babies and especially when I reached menopause.

I am feeling so good now, though, that I never want to gain back any of that unneeded weight. One day I will have to return and report to my God what I did with this body He gave me. I hope I will be able to tell Him I took good care of it and thus was able to be a more useful and fit tool in His hands.

Cindy Lou

I warned you I would be blogging about my children. Tonight I am going to get started carrying out the threat. And since Cindy usually gets saved until last because she is the youngest, I chose her as my first post.

Yesterday I was going through a box of memories; you know, the cards, letters, sticky-notes, etc. you just can't throw away because they remind you that someone loves you. Although I have put together books for each of my kids with samples of their handwriting, report cards, schoolwork, artwork, etc. and have given them to them, I still have a few things here to warm my heart. I came across two Mother's Day cards that Cindy gave me when she was 7 and 8 years old. I had to call her and read them to her so she could get a good laugh. Here's the poem she wrote in the first one: "I love you little I love you big. I love you like a little PIG! Love, Cindy W." The background of the poem was a computer-drawn pig.

In Indiana the school taught phonetic spelling, so keep that in mind as you read what she wrote in the second card: "I can't beleav that it has been 8 years seins I was born. You were 32 wein I was born and now you are 40! But even thogh your 40 I guss you can have a Happy Moters day! Love, Cindy."

Is there any wonder Cindy has chosen to build upon her writing and public relations capabilities by seeking a PR degree?

My due date for Cindy was May 18th. I started having contractions early, first on May 1st, my dad's birthday, then on May 9th, my mother's birthday, and then on the 16th--Michael's and Katy's shared birthday. By the time the 19th came I was so exhausted from lack of sleep as the constant contractions were keeping me from resting, and I told the doctor that by the time the baby came I wouldn't be worth anything. He sent me to the hospital and started the labor that morning and she made her entrance into the world about 5:30 p.m. She didn't want to share her birthday with anyone else, and she did get her own. But I should tell this story, too: I had thought about when was the ideal time to have a baby, since I'd had some in the spring and some in the fall. I had picked the time I wanted to have my sixth baby and was able to start the pregnancy right on schedule. However, I had a miscarriage and lost the baby. That meant I would have to wait nearly a year to start all over again. One day I was in the shower and pondering the situation and I thought I heard a voice say: "I don't care when I'm born! I just want my body!" Cindy spoke to me long before I got to see her and smell her and hold in my arms. And I've been learning from her ever since!

Cindy was my baby, and my buddy for a few years after the others had all started school. When we moved to Indiana we explored our new town while the others were gone all day. We discovered Aldi's, which became our favorite grocery store. We put lots of miles on our van as we became acquainted with our town and Northwest Indiana. We talked and talked while we were on the road. She made up jingles, and I could kick myself over and over again because I didn't get them on paper. She would have been a great advertiser! One of my favorite moments when we were on the road was when we were listening to a tape recording of "Chicago." "If you see me walking down the street, look away, look away, I don't want you to see me this way." Cindy asked me, "Why doesn't he want her to see him that way? Is he...naked?"

Cindy made a little booklet of cartoons which depicted office doors with signs on them. I wish I could remember them. That's one of the things I passed on to her for her posterity. I think one of them was "Office of Wildlife Resources" and the sign hanging from the doorknob said "Gone Fishing."

My journal has many entries with cute things Cindy said and did as a child. She was always so delightful and I called her my "sunshine." She still lights up a room when she enters.

I've always been able to count on Cindy for laughs, hugs, intelligent and deep conversation, for understanding, help, and for reminders of how much Heavenly Father loves me. After she left home and we became empty nesters I looked forward to her frequent phone calls that helped me realize that although she was a young woman living in a grown-up world now she still wanted that connection with Mom. That meant more to me than I can express.

Now she is a married woman, belonging to that handsome Eric. But although he can call her his, there will always be part of her in me, because without Cindy I would not be complete.

I love you, Cindy, my sunshine, my darling!